Singin' in the Rain

Sorry for the long gap, everyone!
I went to the jungle. The real jungle. With subterranean metal eels, black, glinting, mile-high trees and rivers with honking yellow fish.
New York.

One of the coolest things about New York was that I could be completely invisible. Among the 8 million inhabitants on that 12 mile island, (almost) nothing you can do would surprise anybody. I walked down the streets on my last night there, belting out Amy Winehouse, getting a couple smiles and one holler, "Where's the PARTY?!" and that was it. Imagine me doing that in Moraga?! A S.W.A.T. team would have soundlessly and successfully removed my inappropriate imposition on polite society. But not in New York.
It was immensely freeing.
I loved the feeling of being able to walk anywhere and find exotic and unusual experiences available from all over the world. I loved the proximity of art. I loved the way people "walk" the streets there. More like carve the streets. Each person's private audition as a shark cutting through minnows (that they didn't feel like devouring at the moment).
I loved that just an hour away there is lush greenery and untamed forest.
I found that I like New York much more than I ever would have imagined liking a big city.
My generous hosts, Nilufer and Kaika, invited me to their lovely home in the country (just a 1:40 hr. train ride from Manhattan). I had a sumptuous and cozy time in their loving company, enjoying oodles of Nilufer's delicious cooking and the bubbly company of their two delightful mini poodle mixes, Bella and Romeo.


Some highlights of my adventures in NY:
I got to see the MOMA and the Metropolitan Museum of Art (twice), I went to the posh and spa-like 24 Hour Fitness in Manhattan for free (thank you, Tatiana!!), saw the most incredible performance by the 20 piece orchestra Alarm Will Sound covering Aphex Twin in the most original and intelligent manner, spent time (and money) in Manhattans juicy Little India, lounged in Washington Square with my good friend Michael, listening to some fellas with guitars and mandalins playing The Beatles, had my 5 minutes of being lost in the Bronx (uneventfully), ate fresh canolli made in a 90 year-old Italian Bakery in Hoboken, N.J., got to run around in the NY rain (happily), took myself out to dinner on a romantic date (with...myself) on my last night to a cozy restaurant in Little Italy, and finally, on my ride out of Manhattan to the airport, was seen off by a great Mariachi band on the subway.

But really, it wasn't about all these things I got to do or see...it was about a new understanding about who I am and what I have to bring. That I really, above all, just want to serve my higher purpose. This may include a grand level of exposure in the Art World...or it may not. I'm coming to feel that if I simply work to fulfill the talents I was given with integrity, the rest will fall into place. And coming to a deeper understanding of that was the best ride of all.

I'm currently in Portland, OR after spending four days with a wonderful human being I met through Couch Surfing -- Candice. Complete and beautiful universal serendipity. She's such a soul sister, and it feels so completely, fully wonderful to know her! I'll post about the extreme level of fun I had with her and her friends in Salt Lake City when I have more photos to include (she's emailing them to me).

Looking forward to being with the Redwoods soon!

May peace be with you,

Shivani

Partytime

Have you ever seen 14 year-olds swooping through the sky and plummeting to near-deaths with smiles smeared across their faces like healthy helpings of butter? Cirque du Soleil, my friends. Some of the most incredible performing, choreography, costuming and overall artistic delivery of a concept I've ever seen in my life.
My dear friend Rainbow treated me to a 30 hour stay in Las Vegas, NV, where I luxuriated in his and Kelli's spacious and gracious suite at the Bellagio, overlooking the water show that is one of the many incredible works of art that makes that hotel famous. I soaked in the opulent Bellagio spa, ate at the only raw food restaurant for probably 500 miles, looked at the collection of modern art in the Bellagio Fine Art Gallery (some big names in there--I do love Clyfford Still) showered probably 4 times (because the shower was just that excellent), and had exquisite meals at elegant restaurants in the area. The Cirque du Soleil show was called "Love", plays only at the Mirage in Vegas and is based on the legacy and message of The Beatles. I highly recommend checking out this little taste of it (let alone seeing the show itself): http://www.cirquedusoleil.com/en/shows/love/default.aspx
I had been to Las Vegas once before, but my experience of the place was not one I would have characterized with words like, "exquisite refinement" or "tasteful elegance"...and this trip was indeed made up of experiences that could be so described.
I am forever grateful to Rainbow for this beautiful experience.
My time in Las Vegas was a lavish contrast to the past couple months of camping in the cold or hot, showering with a gallon jug of Coleman stove-heated water.

Yet, I am grateful to be cozied back in the quiet of the desert.
I spent the latter half of yesterday researching painting spots in Arches National Park (Utah). I could barely drive straight, I was so taken by the other-worldliness of that place. After I finish with this post, I'll be venturing out to some select places to paint.

Another fantastic development that I can hardly believe is that I've been offered the opportunity to stay in New York for two weeks! Some dear friends of the family have offered me an apartment available to them right on Times Square. I'm a little delirious about this...hardly know what to do with myself. I've never really been to New York, and am ecstatic about the opportunities available there artistically. Even if I only get to look at work in New York, I know the time there will be rich with influence for me. If y'all have any suggestions about where to go in NY, leave a comment here!
Peace. Love. Apricots.

Couch Surfing!

I feel as though my trip has built itself into a big creature...and I'm along for the ride. Like a small child hanging on at the end of the taut leash attached to the eager St. Bernard's collar. But much more fun. I was organizing all my photos and remembering all the many beautiful moments and places and people I've met...how do things like this create themselves? I'm in awe of this experience.

By complete chance and practically no work on my part, (well, not the kind of work you usually have to put into these kinds of things) my work has been accepted at a small gallery in Pagosa Springs, Colorado. I painted 2 paintings specifically for this show, and am including a larger one done in Sedona, as well. I'm planning to somehow get some nice quality photos taken of theses pieces (in case they sell!), and if they do sell, I'll be sure to post pictures of them so you'll all get to see them. The reception for the show is July 3rd and the show ends July 31st, and I’m extremely excited! Its amazing to really embrace this path as my professional presence in the world.

On the subject of being in the world, I had to get all three pieces framed, which was not something I had planned into my budget, and it was expensive, so I’m looking for a way to pick up some dough some way or another…or perhaps these paintings will sell! 

I’m happy either way.

After visiting with the Goddesses, I journeyed to Taos, NM to greet the great Rio Grande Gorge and the mystical quality of that land. It was magnificent. Plus, I spent some of my time there in a yurt on an organic farm owned by a man who makes his living as a painter! It was a lovely experience. I met him through Couchsurf.org and am now highly recommending this network to my loved ones (you!). I see it as a beautiful way to connect us all; a way to stay with a family or individual anywhere in the world, and share your experiences publicly, creating a community that establishes trust and camaraderie. The real experience of the Global Family. I see it as a revolution, a delightful way that we can build towards world peace. For instance, I’ve been couch surfing here in Pagosa Springs, and considering that 1.) I am in the company of a wonderful person who has deep insights into life and enjoys philosophizing, 2.) a washer, dryer, kitchen, bathroom (with a SHOWER!) and bedroom are graciously offered for nothing in exchange, and 3.) all of my artwork has had a chance to dry indoors, couch surfing has my vote.

Here’s the URL: www.couchsurf.org (Please note their request for respect for the ethics they outline before you sign up, if you’re interested. I intend only to refer those willing to contribute to this community in a positive way. As I know you all will:)).

Anyway, things are brilliant. In oh so many ways!!

Will keep y’all posted about the gallery opening:)

Goddesses

I've had two hot showers in luxurious conditions in the last four days.

Can a human being ask for greater pleasures?
Yes.
(But I'm very grateful for hot showers.)

I got to spend the last four days with Amanda and Tara, dear heart-fellows I met during my time in Santa Cruz. We went to Ten Thousand Waves together (a traditional Japanese Bath House in Santa Fe, NM) after camping at the lovely Black Canyon Campground (which felt like a capital city in Fly Kingdom--a very shared habitat). We later had an inspiring and thought provoking lunch with Tara's godmother and her boyfriend, and then sauntered over to Kakawa, a chocolate-only wonderland of a cafe. The owner, Peter, has studied chocolate for about 30 years, and has hot chocolate recipes that date back to the mid-1600's from the Mayans, the Spanish and French, as well as truffles like peach pink peppercorn, rosemary, vanilla black pepper and gorgonzola. And they were each absolutely incredible.

Before this beautiful time with the Goddesses, I took the trip from Ouray through Telluride back to Pagosa Springs, via highway 145--which is where all of the photos in this post came from. Surreal beauty. Colorado has been so generous with its magnificence to me.
A little story: I was driving along and was struck by the beauty of the range of mountains to my left, so I pulled over, left the truck running and ran out to the other side of the road to take a shot of them.
My Little Truck, as dear as she is, has a few irregularities, one of them being that the locking mechanism in the driver's side door on my truck has some alignment issues. When it is unlocked and you pull the handle, it locks itself. I had left the door open as I was taking my picture, and a gust of wind rose up and blew it happily shut...locking me out of my truck, as she sat there idling, amicably playing my Jaga Jazzist CD, waiting for me to get back on in.
I had nothing on me; only my camera. So help was needed.
A very sweet couple pulled over, lending me their cell phone, a jacket, water and good company. We all actually had a lot of fun, and when the AAA guy came out, it felt funny to just say goodbye and that be that--it had been one of those moments of connection where we didn't need a lot of introduction time; we sort of just became family. I've got their info and they've got mine...we'll stay in touch.

This trip has been quite full of moments like this one. Its been a rich reminder that we are all family, ultimately.
I've decided that I'm going to create world peace within and work out from there.

Ouray

Ouray, CO is beautiful, little and full of water in a good way. I've been here for the last four days, hiking, painting, working on graphic design a little...I've discovered that at about 3:02 PM every day, it rains. And you can never tell if it will be raining for the rest of the day or just for that one little spurt. Mark Twain supposedly said, "If you hate the weather in Kauai, just wait a few minutes." (or something like that)--makes me think of this place.

This is just a quickie; wanted to share some magic and beauty with you all:)

Christ in the Desert

So plans changed. Of course they did; it's one of the few things you can predict!
I took highway 84 from Santa Fe north, with the plan of hitting 160 and heading west to Moab, UT. Hwy 84 takes you along the robust Chama river-which, after being in such dry country for so long, is mesmerizing in its vivacity and freshness. Without planning it, I managed to take myself to a bunch of places my beloved aunt Margo had recommended going (she lived in NM for a number of years). I spent time in the unearthly (meaning a bit strange) village of Abiquiu and visited the Benedictine Abbey of "Christ in the Desert", which was also...a different, though beautiful, experience for me. I managed to enter the chapel as the congregation-of maybe 10-12 monks and the sprinkling of visitors that had happened by that day-began to sing the psalms of that hour and day (there's a very specific set of psalms for different seasons and times of day, I later learned). I picked up the book of psalms and sang along, mostly because I prefer the experience of participating over that of watching from afar.
Now, my spiritual foundation (Hinduism) is based in there being nothing separating one from God (except one's own belief in there being separateness), and there is also no intrinsic evil. The psalms I sang with the Benedictine monks begged God not to stand so far off, to forgive us for our sins and to right the sinner's assumption that he'll be getting off scott free. The experience of taking on these beliefs temporarily by singing them was an interesting one; you find that your body lets you know how it feels about new information; I felt afraid and alone, and sort of naked after the 30 minutes or so I spent there. Though it wasn't a fire and brimstone sort of lecture, I did feel more able to understand the fear that drives the actions of some. Not to say that my way is better...its just different. The monastery is amazing in its architecture and environmental savvy--they're over 20 miles from town on a 15 mi/hr. dirt road, and they're totally self sufficient.
I spent a night on Abiquiu Lake...a tremendously powerful place, even though the lake is a product of damming the Chama. I found the campsite, bookmarked it in my head and decided to drive further without reason. It was like being pulled by a tractor beam. In a few minutes, I found myself in front of this huge, dark mesa that dominated the land for miles with its presence. I decided to draw it. It was the only thing I felt I could do to honor its magnifiscence enough.
The next day I asked the campsite host what the name of that mesa was. He said, "Oh that's Padernal. The Indians say it's the center of the Earth." I've got to say, it sure felt like it.
Later that day I found that I was at Ghost Ranch, the ranch in the desert that Georgia O'Keefe (who inspires me to no end as a free, strong woman who painted Nature's extravagant beauty) visited frequently and eventually moved to. Many of her paintings come from that place, and it resonates with a kind of kinetic mystery...I was entranced. Spent a few hours there just walking around, looking at the towering red earth everywhere.

I crossed the border of New Mexico into Colorado that day and fell in love. Ever since I was a little girl, I had talked about living in Colorado and raising horses on a big ranch. I'd never been to Colorado, nor do I remember even seeing pictures of it, but somehow, it really is one of the most gorgeous places I've ever been. I just may live here some day. And there are horses EVERYWHERE.
An amazing opportunity fell into my lap the day I got here (which is Pagosa Springs, CO). I sauntered into a little gallery in town and left with a very good chance that I may get to show a few pieces there in July! I walked in with absolutely no intention of making this happen; just wanted some inspiration, but the gallery owner happened to be in and we spoke for gosh, two hours. I showed her my portfolio book (THANK YOU, Auntie Mala for that idea, and THANK YOU Keith for making it happen!!!) and she said that if I applied asap, she'd love my work on their walls.
SO, I've spent the last six days here, painting the mountains in this area (figuring that 1. I do actually want to sell some work since I'll be putting some money down to display it, 2. tourists will be the ones buying most likely, and 3.this place is GORGEOUS and worth painting.) I put my application in the next day. Now just waiting to see what the review committee says.
So, no Moab for now. I plan to drive north to Ouray and Telluride to spend some time painting those mountains. Then I'll go back to Santa Fe to meet up with Amanda and Tara, where we shall have a blast in the desert. Moab after that. Maybe.

Temple Mountain

So I have arrived back in the Southwest. My first two days back were spent in the gracious ward of friends I was introduced to by a friend in Canyon. They're of that caliber of person that you meet and become instant family with. They showered me with gifts (both physical and intellectual and spiritual), shared their arts with me, graced with me with a total resort experience in their gorgeous home and educated me in the rich treasure available for experience and painting in the Southwest. I left their company feeling completely rejuvenated, enriched, nourished. What a blessing. Hoping to return the love when they visit Canyon soon.
I've been camping these last 3 days; it's completely marvelous. Lots of unpredictable weather here; seems like it'll be a warm, clear day and 4 minutes later the wind blasts in rain-pregnant clouds and sky ripping thunder--and you find yourself in the company of numerous magical puddles in your poorly water-proofed tent. But it's incredibly beautiful. I spent a night in Lockett Meadow in the San Francisco Mountains near Flagstaff, AZ. Did a hike into the Inner Basin-it felt like pilgrimage to a temple, as perhaps you can see from the pictures. The next day I drove all the way to Santa Fe-which was really a long drive-and stopped in Petrified National Forest where I was rendered almost unconscious by the geological majesty of the Painted Desert. Spent the last two nights in the Santa Fe National Forest, which has been sweet and cozy. Started raining today; cold, overcast. The plan is to head out to Moab, UT to paint for a few weeks at Arches NP, Green River Overlook/Island in the Sky and the Needles section. Probably won't have much internet access during this period, so love to you all, and may peace and compassion be with you:)

Farewell Sedona

My days in Sedona are drawing to a close. I'll be leaving tomorrow for the airport in Phoenix to make it to a friend's wedding. Vision Questing will continue when I return to Phoenix on May 27th.
A couple days ago I went for a hike though the "Red Rock Secret Mountain Wilderness" (really-that's what it's called!). The West Fork Trail goes along Oak Creek through Oak Creek Canyon, averaging at about 1,000 ft. down into the canyon. It was absolutely spectacular.
The smells, the majestic rock shooting up like great walls of carved
bone or marble all venetian red; I was definitely in one of the Lands of Faerie. It was so nourishing to spend some real time frolicking in nature. Painting in nature is an intimate and gratifying experience, but you are working, and usually sitting or standing. It was good to run and leap and explore wildly.


A notable part of the adventure was a field of the most interesting...webs. At least that's what your eyes tricked you to think at first, but on the double take ('cause they're too big to be spider webs), you find that they're really sacs with MASSIVE CATERPILLAR-LOOKING THINGS squirming around inside.
No one else on the trail knew what they were, though there were some very hornet-looking insects seeming to keep guard just in that area; or maybe they were feasting? I've never heard of hornets evolving from caterpillars...anyone have any clues?


I made a friend: Austin. He was headed for the full depth of the canyon-14 miles, and was planning to take 4 days to backpack in and back. I tagged along like a little puppy, asking him question after question about how he prepared himself for his venture; I was incredibly envious. His pack weighed maybe 40 lbs., with stove, tent, sleeping bag, food, fishing gear and clothes all magically stuffed inside. A modern day (male) Mary Poppins.

I've mostly finished two 24"x 36" paintings of Sedona's breath-taking red rock, as well as a poster for the music festival, "Womansong" put on by the brilliant singer songwriter Amanda West. I am lucky enough to be invited as Guest Artist for this event by the Big Sur Spirit Garden, and am planning for it to be the first show of the work from this trip when I get back (mark your calendar: 8/15! Come hear/see: http://www.myspace.com/amandawestmusic). I have also nearly finished a business card design for a client (and dear friend:) ), and will be done with a website piece for webmaster Keith Garrett (he built my website: http://shivanirajan.com.) This is part of a series of sites he's producing-they'll be gorgeous and very full of pithy mind-fodder.

This time has been grounding, full of discipline and hard work, and incredibly freeing. Last night I was sitting on the little swing outside on the porch listening to the crickets, looking out to the chapel close to the house. I never did go there, but just the sight of it is beautiful and gives some sense of peace and reflection, whatever one's faith (or non-faith).

Words are so small no matter the cleverness of their arrangement; when it comes to expressing the magnitude of what I have to be grateful for, I just have to let it play through my heart to my face, and smile it out.
Bye for now, will post more once I return to Arizona.

Tofurky kilbasa

The last few days have been spectacular. I've been working hard on 5 art projects for friends and loved ones; business cards, two website art pieces, a poster and a birthday present...let alone the two 24" x 36" paintings that I'm finishing now of Sedona. It's been so wonderful to be so immersed in art! This time has been very much about discipline; I've been getting up at about 5-5:30 every morning to finish my meditation and house/kitty chores in time to get out of the house to paint early enough to miss the heat. Then I come back, rest for a little bit, and get working on the Projects.
I've been enjoying cooking for myself. I don't know why everyone always says they eat poorly when they are on their own...I'm diggin' it! Sometimes I just have a voluptuous smoothie for lunch. Sometimes I do up these incredible Tofurky kilbasas that Keith turned me on to--oh! You've gotta try them. They're really delicious. Slice one in half, saute it on both sides, cut it up and put it in with beans and rice on a blue corn tortilla with cheese, pico de gallo, avo and sprouts, and you're goood.
Anyway. I've been enjoying my time here immensely. Have decided for the sake of having enough time to finish the projects I'm working on as well as have some restful/inner time, I'm not putting myself out there much. In fact, I'm sort of avoiding other people. In a nice way.
I'm waking up feeling cheerful. I always feel like that's such a gauge of what my life is like, and it's a really nice feeling to have it be as it is right now.
I'm incredibly grateful.

Accepting headphones...

Got up early today and headed back to Cathedral Rock to keep working...it was wonderful to be there early in the day; shady, much less foot traffic, and I broke down and listened to music as I painted. I usually don't when I'm outside because Nature is filled with music, but I did it and I enjoyed it for three reasons:
1.) Headphones make peace with the excruciatingly large family of bugs that buzz in your ears because it's apparently necessary for their survival.
2.) It tells passersby that I'm not...available
3.) I can focus better with music playing.

Art is so incredibly healing and deep. And it's work. It's a wonderful combination.
I went further into uptown Sedona yesterday; went up to Flagstaff via Oak Creek Canyon. Oak Creek Canyon was beautiful, very green and the creek is delightfully cold.
Uptown Sedona on the other hand is...well, terrible. Really cheap (in taste, not $ of course), run-of-the-mill touristy places. Sedona is such an incredibly spiritual place, it's sad to see it juxtaposed with such an low level of consciousness. Oh well, I guess. One thing that's cool about things that are terrible is that you can really appreciate improvement when it happens. Maybe it will here.

Wait and Salivate

So I painted today. It was AMAZING!!! I got a sunburn, I ran up and down a big ridge 4 times getting things I'd forgotten at the bottom, the wind was blowing everything away, and it was just RAD. I'm not going to take a picture of the painting for you; you'll just have to wait and salivate. But I'm stoked that the red rock was willing to lend itself to me for a few hours.
I also finally found a local printing place that'll do my business cards relatively quickly and cheaply. And I went back to the library and liberated them of a pilates DVD, "The Brave One" and (heheh) "Dreamgirls". Saw "Michael Clayton", "Capote" and "Music and Lyrics" last time. Seems like a good idea to balance the serious ones with some definite silly ones. The library's been very good to me. I polished off Neil Gaiman's "Anansi Boys" over the last two days...I highly recommend it. Really anything he's written. He's fabulous. I've got a thing for witty, imaginative writers, I'm finding.
Sedona is turning out to be pretty cool. The people are generally really friendly and don't feel too judgmental or...you know...messed up (whatever that means). I met a wonderful lady named Roberta who's an artist and owns a gallery with works by local artists uptown. I think I wanted to give her a hug four times during the 20 minutes we talked; she was so delightful.

I feel those barnacles falling off...feel a bit shinier, a bit more bright-eyed, and happy in general. I strongly feel that anyone in a human body should do things like this now and then. It's like taking supplements. But its guaranteed to work.

Love you all...

Play

I explored the red rock around me today. It was marvelous. I've felt a bit cooped up, and dashing around in the desert was just what I needed. Everything is much more sensitive here (ecologically speaking); I reined in my glee (just to a degree, of course) so as to remain respectful in step.

I've Googled the local library and am on my way there after this computer moment...need more reading material! Just finished "The Graveyard Book" by Neil Gaiman (Thank you Stan!!). Dug it. He can't help but be a good story teller. The freedom of being here is sinking in.
I feel great.

Sedona

Well, I'm here.
Ta daa!!

Sedona is unlike anywhere else I've been...like most places; but really so for Sedona. The picture above was taken as I drove in, snapped quickly at a stop sign. These magnificent rock formations shoot up from the ground all of the sudden as you zoom along on the mostly flat desert-they're breath-taking and imposing and feel much closer than they are.
The air is clear, it's not too hot, people meet your eye here, and everything is a delicious red. The sidewalks can't even escape being stained by this tenacious powdery dye.

I've had time for the first time in a long time. It's wonderful and weird and a little scary because everything you have to stuff onto those back burners bulges out and pops into mind; and then you can't stop the deluge.
But it's good.
It's going to be good to roll around and get red in the desert. To be free.
Hope you're all well! Drop a line!
xo,
S

Vision Quest '09

So I've decided to name this venture "Vision Quest '09". It's a bit of a play on words because this trip is about questing for vistas, or visions to paint. The more common interpretation is also totally appropriate. Much of this trip is about discovery, freedom, the vastness of the desert, the stark hilarity of rock shooting towards the sky. I would like to share this journey with you; it may be mostly through photos, with an occasional anecdote; it may be more wordy. I may post things daily, maybe once a month. I promise that I will remember that this journey is about discovery and freedom, and if writing about it too much gets in the way of those goals, I may stick to a pictorial story. 
Thank you all for tuning in--will start in Sedona in early May!

Love, light and beauty to all of you,

Shivani